It has been a rough couple of days in the life of Mary. First the problem of the scale issue(have actually gained 2 pounds now...), then just plain regret and depression came along. Now, I have developed Lactose Intolerance. My whole world seems to be shaken in the last 2 days.
I have been stuck in the pit. I have been struggling so much from hunger and physical fatigue, that my emotional state of mind has suffered. I have even told Bryan that I want my old stomach back(which is in the dumpster and can't be replaced)! I know, when I step back a few months from now, I will think all this was just silly, but when you are in the mud and the mire, it is pretty much all you can focus on.
So, last night I developed SEVERE stomach cramps and chills. They were so bad that I could not sleep without the help of pain medication, and even that did little more than to dull the pain. The nasty little culprit is dairy. Well, guess what my whole new diet is made of....dairy. Yogurt, pudding, cream based soups. *sigh* Per the nurse's order, I have to go back to clear liquids for a couple of days. Hello again Jello and Popsicles. It makes me want to cry just typing it!
So, I am asking you all to pray for me. I am in a VERY bad place emotionally. I am seeking God, but sometimes the despair of the situation is overwhelming.
I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry, He lifted me out of the slimy pit , out of the mud and the mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord. Psalm 40:1-3
Dear Lord, hear my cry! Deliver me from this sadness. Help me through these circumstances. Give me a new song to sing!
Oh, I'm so sorry, Mary! Praying joy for you today! Hang in there!
ReplyDeletePray Gods word sweetie!! More powerful than a two-edged sword--remember He will "...never leave you or forsake you". He can't...so you are not alone in that pit! Praying for you darlin' :)
ReplyDeleteCall me when you feel up to it, and I can give you all the foods Samuel can eat without triggering his lactose intolerance. {HUG} Having seen him go through those cramps, I feel for you. {HUG}
ReplyDeleteMary, I worked with a girl who had stomach surgery, but hers was the one they call the Y when they take out the duodenal switch. That was about 6 yes ago. I write that to say that I watched and listened to her struggles for a year. If she ate more than 4 oz of a serving of food she would automatically throw up. She was terrified to eat in a restaurant because the food was good and the portions were huge. I watched her stack Oreos areound her desk, methodically , staring at them in longing but knowing she could only have one in a 2hr period because her stomach couldn't process the sugar effectively. Her hair fell out as she lost minerals and nutrients because her new intestines could not filter them out of her food. In the end she lost 200 pounds and got married. Her dress was a size 6 , a size she had never worn in her life. She became a happy, radiant, positive, and self assured woman.
ReplyDeleteI write all of this to say that the sleeve surgery you have had is so much better for your body in the long term, than the original stomach surgeries. Also, your struggles will end and you will be rewarded with a new HEALTHY and TINY body, and that wonderful personality of yours will radiate happiness and confidence. You will also give hope to all of us who struggle with our weight. Try to remember that a journey without a struggle is merely a walk to nowhere. However to struggle through a journey will lead you to a closer relationship with Christ and a reward at the end of the long line of pain.
Love to you! April
Mary, I am so sorry to hear about this. I will be praying for you. God will get you past this part!
ReplyDeleteLove,
Holly