I have started this blog a few days late. I wish I would have thought about it prior to surgery, but I think it is better late than never. To give those that don't know the background, I had a Gastric Vertical Sleeve proceedure done 3 days ago. Even though the physical journey began just a few days ago, the spiritual journey began several months ago.
It began when I realized that I was addicted to food. Just like someone would be addicted to drugs or alcohol, my substance of choice is food. After I realized that, my journey led me to a book titled Made to Crave. This is when I had to wake up and face the fact that my addiction is a sin and it is something that I have to work through in a spiritual sense as well.
Through lots of prayer Bryan and I decided that this weight loss surgery would be the TOOL that would help aide me in my weight loss journey. It is not the fix, it is something that will help me along the way. You see, I have to fight this battle on my own. I still will have to fight the fight to keep my eating in a place that will glorify God. He cares about what we eat and it angers him when we abuse the temple he has given us. We were made to crave him and nothing else.
I had to fall on my knees and beg for forgiveness for all the times that I had turned to food instead of Him. You see, food was my comfort and my friend, not my Lord. Oh, how that must sadden him!!
I was in a very good place going into surgery. I knew that I was doing the right thing. God was on my side and he was never going to let me go. He is the Shepherd and he takes care of his sheep!
The surgery went well. No complications and I was released from the hospital on Tuesday morning.
That is when things got rough. I couldn't keep even an ounce of liquid down with out extreme pain and nausea. I questioned my decision, but God gave me such peace when I cried out to him for help.
This morning I hit my second roadbump. I wanted food!! I could smell it and see it. It was all around me, but I couldn't have it! I was mourning the loss of my friend, food. I again turned to God and he gave the answer in Romans 6:19. It says" I put this in human terms because you are weak in your natural selves. Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness". You see, I have to think of this phase as restriction that is defining my parameters of freedom. I have to be trusted with little in order to be trusted with much. I have to go thru this pain and sadness of mourning food so that I can learn to turn to the Lord for all comfort and strength. Little by little I will be trusted with more, but I must prove myself worthy!
May all glory be unto God as I take this journey. Will you travel with me?
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