The Interest of Others

With Bryan being out of town this week, the responsibility of taking care of Eleanor has been completely on my shoulders.  It is weeks like this that I am amazed and in awe of how single parents do it.  My house is a wreck and my nerves are frayed.  How in the world do they even do it?  I want to say right now that God has some special jewels to go into the crowns of single parents when they get to heaven!  My hat is off to you!
That being said, I have been feeling a little selfish.  I just want some "me time".  Can't I just watch what I want to on the television?  Can't you just get yourself something to drink?  Do you have to keep me company in the bathroom?  These questions and many others are flooding my mind in the last few days.
How about these questions that we ask God.  Do you really want me to volunteer to do THAT job at the church?  I really don't enjoy doing it.  Do you really want me to be nice to that person?  They have wronged me so many times.  Can't you convict someone else to step up to the plate and fill the role?  Why do they get all the blessings and I get stuck with the struggles?  Can't you just work that out for my benefit, God?
You see, we are all about fulfilling our own interests.  What seems "fair" in our eyes.  For everyone looks out for his own interests, not those of Jesus Christ.  Philippians 2:21  It is so hard to take a step back and recognize this about ourselves.  It is something that we all struggle with.  EVERYONE looks out for his own interest, Paul says. 
But, I can't just throw my hands up and say, "Oh well, that is how God made me!".  For we are also told to practice humility.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Philippians 2: 3&4
Man, sometimes it is hard being a christian!  No wonder Jesus is the only one that ever got it right!  Yesterday I learned that I need to keep my mouth shut and today I learned that I have to but the interest of others before my own.  I am starting to realize what it means to "die to one self".  It may not be easy, but with God's power in me, anything is possible.  And when I fail, then grace is there to fill in the gap!